What is Biblical SEL?

Written By Natalie S

Definitions & significance of scripture-driven social emotional learning.

BY TARA MADDEN-DENT, PH.D | www.biblicalsel.org

Who does not need Jesus? We all do!

His Truth heals, restores, loves, and saves…all things that help humans live healthy, happier lives; things needed more today in our complex world, than ever before.

So, to help us to realign our daily perspectives and behaviors with His holy values and instruction, we apply His Word into five essential human development skills (Self-awareness, Self-management, Social awareness, Relationship skills, Responsible decision-making), also known as Biblical SEL to ensure that we more regularly obey His teachings and seek a life that honors Him. Let’s dive deeper into what that means…

You see, God provided us with specific Biblical instruction on how to live healthy & respectful lives that allow us to do more than survive, but thrive. He even sent us His son Jesus who modeled and taught these essential human skills which are described here as Biblical SEl skills. These scripture-provided competencies help us pursue Jesus-centered daily living, with a Godly perspective to keep us focused on WHY our thoughts and actions are pathways to know God and HOW the produce the fruits of the Spirit. As followers of Jesus, we are to foster Biblical SEL skills ourselves, in our children, families, and communities so that we foster disciples who honor God and love others.

WHAT IS BIBLICAL SEL?

Humans were created by supreme Intelligent Designer. This God, taught us exactly how we are to properly operate our bodies, minds, and souls; as well as how to communicate, collaborate, and respectfully co-exist with others. . . it’s all in Bible.

We are to seek and practice God-centered, peaceful, merciful, generous, and respectful lives that honor Him and that love others. When we study scripture to apply it’s instruction as a foundation for our development, we practice Biblical SEL skills. These skills allow us to live moment-by-moment, with a spiritual re-posturing of focus, perspective, and intention-setting so that the heart, mind, & behavior abide in him.

Without this Biblical lens, the absence of His values will result in confusion and harm. We see secular SEL today too often contributing towards human development that place life-purpose and worth on worldly values, idols, and behaviors. Beware of this hollow SEL (COL 2:8), for often it act counterproductively to our goals of fostering healthy, thriving humans in safe environments. Instead, let’s bring God back to the forefront of our lives, so that He is the center of all that we think, say, and do (COL3:17). . . this is supported with daily practices of Biblical SEL.

Biblical SEL is defined as, a lifelong process of learning and applying knowledge, skills, and attitudes to develop healthy identities in Christ, manage emotions and achieve personal and collective goals that abide in Him, feel and show empathy for others who we love unconditionally, establish and maintain respectful relationships and make responsible caring decisions.

A Biblical framework for SEL helps us better understand ourselves and how to manage personal growth (Self-Awareness; Self-Management), how to authentically know others and respectfully bridge cultural gaps (Social-Awareness; Relationship Skills), & achieve purpose-driven commitments (Responsible Decision-Making).

WHAT ARE THE FIVE BIBLICAL SEL SKILLS?

1 BIBLICAL SELF-AWARENESS

There has never been a “you” before, there’s not another currently, and there will never be a “you” again. God made you with specific abilities, developed through unique experiences, to live at a specific and intentional time, for a purposeful impact with those whom you, and you alone, can love (in only the way that you can).

Definition of Biblical Self-Awareness: The abilities to understand one’s own Holy life purpose, emotions, thoughts, values, strengths, limitations, and how they influence goals, worldviews, morals, self-esteem, self-confidence, and behaviors.

Examples include:

  • Integrating personal and social identities

  • Identifying personal, cultural, and linguistic assets

  • Identifying one’s emotions

  • Acknowledging one’s honesty and integrity

  • Linking feelings, values, and thoughts

  • Examining prejudices and biases

  • Experiencing and recognizing self-efficacy

  • Having a growth mindset

  • Developing interests and sense of purpose

Why do we want to practice Biblical Self-Awareness? Our identity, purpose, and self-value come from knowing who we are:

  • I am created in His image (Gen 1:27), He knows me by name (Isaiah 43:1), and I am alive with Christ (Eph 2:5).

  • I am the temple of the living God (2 Corinthians 6:16).

  • I have a specific life purpose to love God & love others (Matthew 22:37-39; Col 3:17).

  • I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14).

  • For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do (Eph 2:10).

  • I am to love (1 Corinthians 13:4-7).

1 BIBLICAL SELF-MANAGEMENT

The Bible provides numerous examples of self-management to help us learn about regulating emotions, thoughts, and behaviors. We are to do everything for the glory of God (1Cor 10:31; Col 3:17) and this includes self-regulation skills like active listening (Proverbs 18:13); respectful communication (James 1:19; Proverbs 1:1), and to not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God (Phil 4:6). Let us behave decently, rejoice, and keep our thoughts focused on good (Phil 4:1-9). be still and know God (Psalm 46:10) and pray without ceasing (Col 1:9).

Definition of Biblical Self-Management: The abilities to manage one’s emotions, thoughts, and behaviors effectively in different situations and to achieve goals and aspirations aligned with God’s Word. This includes the capacities to delay gratification, manage stress, and feel motivation & agency to accomplish personal/collective goals.

Examples include:

  • Managing one’s emotions

  • Setting personal & collective goals

  • Showing self-discipline & self-motivation

  • Having personal & collective agency

  • Using planning & organization skills

  • Demonstrating the abilities to take initiative

  • Identifying & using stress-management strategies

Why do we want to practice Biblical Self-Management? Our motivation and habits to live according to how we are designed to help us:

  • To take care of ourselves and practice self-control, self-regulation, and gratitude (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18; 1 Peter 4:7; 2 Peter 1:5-6).

  • Develop self-management skills over a life-long process (Romans 5:3-4), produce healthy results (Hebrews 12:11), allow God to sanctify (Gal 5:22-23); and help us become renewed by the knowledge of God and to seek Christ-like ways (Col 3:9-10).

  • Trust in the Lord with all you heart, and do not lean on your own understanding (Proverbs 3:5).

  • Make careful exploration of who you are and the work you have been given, and then sink yourself into that. Don’t be impressed with yourself. Don’t compare yourself with others. Each of you must take responsibility for doing the creative best you can with your own life (Galatians 6:4-5).

  • For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love, and self-discipline (2 Timothy 1:7).

3 BIBLICAL SOCIAL AWARENESS

Jesus was the ultimate teacher on taking perspectives of and empathizing with others, especially those from diverse backgrounds, cultures, & contexts. He loved (and loves) all. Jesus did this by taking time to listen, engage, and show compassion.

Definition of Biblical Social Awareness: The abilities to understand cultural orientations, values, and perspective of others including those from diverse backgrounds & contexts; to show compassion and empathy; to understand broader historical and social behavioral norms; and to respect and recognize the Holy value of each person.

Examples include:

  • Taking others’ perspectives & recognizing strength in others

  • Demonstrating empathy, compassion, & showing concern for others’ feelings

  • Understanding & expressing gratitude

  • Identifying diverse social norms, including unjust ones

  • Recognizing situational demands & opportunities

  • Understanding the influences of organizations & systems on behavior

Why do we want to practice Biblical Social Awareness? Our love and respect for others comes from knowing how God made them:

  • Each of us is valuable! We are all created in His image (Genesis 1:27).

  • We are to love thy neighbor (Mark 12:31).

  • We are all equal; no one is greater than another (John 13:16).

  • Look also to the interests of others (Philippians 2:4).

  • Then he took a cup, and when he had given thanks, he gave it to them, saying, “Drink from it, all of you. This is my blood of the covenant, which is poured out for many for the forgiveness of sins (Matthew 26:27-28).

4 BIBLICAL RELATIONSHIP SKILLS

God created us for and community. Putting The Lord first in our lives is the most important decision we can ever make (Deuteronomy 6:5, 13:3, 30:6; Matthew 22:37; Luke 10:27) and it is the foundation for all other connections. We are called by God in scripture to love our neighbor (Matthew 22), live in peace and harmony with everyone (Romans 12:16; 12:18), engage as peacemakers (Matthew 5:9), and do good to those who hate you (Luke 6:27). We are to serve others as God’s faithful stewards (1 Peter 4:10), to look after orphans and widows (James 1:27) and parents are to focus on raising their children in Christ Jesus ( Ephesians 6:4; Proverbs 22:6).

Definition of Biblical Relationship Skills: The abilities to unconditionally love others, to establish and maintain healthy, respectful, and supportive relationships, and effectively navigate setting with diverse individuals and groups. This includes the capacities to communicate clearly, listen actively, cooperate, work collaboratively to problem solve and negotiate conflict constructively, provide leadership, and seek or offer help when needed.

Examples include:

  • Communicating effectively

  • Offer support & help when needed

  • Demonstrating cultural competency

  • Showing leadership in groups

  • Resolving conflicts constructively

  • Developing positive relationships

  • Resisting negative social pressure and standing up for the rights of others

  • Practicing teamwork and collaborative problem-solving

Why do we want to practice Biblical Relationship Skills? Our relationships reflect our hearts, our hearts reflect knowing God’s word:

  • We are to love thy neighbor (Matthew 22).

  • I am merciful, I do not judge others, and I forgive quickly. As I do this by God’s grace, He blesses my life (Luke 6:36-38).

  • Walk with humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit’s bond of peace (Ephesians 4:1-3).

5 BIBLICAL RESPONSIBLE DECISION-MAKING

We are to fight the good fight, making healthy decisions that honor God in all we do (Col 3:17), to keep faith over the long race (2 Timothy 4:7; Hebrews 12:1). If we commit to the Lord, our plans will succeed (Proverbs 16:3). Others are watching us and our approach to life, our behaviors, our confidence and faith which either encourage them closer to Jesus or away from Him. By receiving the power of the Holy Spirit, He can do miraculous things through us; we have authority and power over the enemy in this world (Mark 16:17-18; Luke 10:17-19).

Examples include:

  • Demonstrating curiosity and open-mindedness

  • Identifying solutions for personal & social problems

  • Learning to make a reasoned judgment after analyzing information, data, and facts

  • Anticipating and evaluating the consequences of one’s actions

  • Recognizing how critical thinking skills are useful both inside & outside of school

  • Reflecting on one’s role to promote personal, family, and community well-being

  • Evaluating personal, interpersonal, community, and institutional impacts

Why do we want to practice Biblical RDM skills? Our life purpose is fulfilled with intentional Biblically-based goals & plans:

  • The plans of the diligent lead surely to abundance, but everyone who is hasty comes only to poverty (Proverbs 21:5).

  • Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight (Proverbs 3:5-6; Jeremiah 29:11).

  • Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it (Proverbs 22:6); they’ll know Him & follow His commandments (Psalm 78:17).

  • Faith without works is dead (James 2:17).

Biblical SEL is a life-long process of constant reflection, perspective-taking, and practice to pursue obedient life choices that lead us to greater wellbeing and a closer, more intimate relationship with God, our Intelligent Designer.

By using a Biblical framework for developing Self-awareness, Self-management, Social Awareness, Relationship Skills, and Responsible Decision-making Skills, we honor God by learning more about who He is and how He uniquely made each of us for a divine purpose. It’s a daily practice to learn our individual skill sets the (Ephesians 2:10), and with Biblical SEL skills, we can do and thrive! Since God is good, ALL the time, and because He loves each of us who are created us in His image, we can rest in Him, His Word, and Truth as we practice Biblical SEL, centered on Jesus.

Additional Resources

Natalie S
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Biblical SEL Defined